Paging Carlos Boozer ...

Holy moly. Did someone poison Carlos Boozer's food? Kill his beloved pet?

I mean, this guy is supposed to be an All-Star player and the straw that stirs the drink for Utah and he's a complete no-show right now. Can Utah get a refund?

In fact, there were several players tonight that should have been cutting the check with a money back guarantee for their employers. These are guys that couldn't find any semblance of a game when their teams needed them most. Guys that I wouldn't want on my rec league team right now. They are:

Carlos Boozer, team captain.

Hedo Turkaglu (his stats always turn out okay, but he commits the most horrific turnovers and has the worst shot selection I've ever seen).

Matt Harpring.

Rasheed Wallace (more temper tantrums than field goals, quit on this team multiple times)

I wanted to find a fifth starter, but nobody quite measured up to the ineptitude of the four guys above. So congrats, fellas, you were in a league of your own.