Sunday, August 05, 2007

Aid to the Clippers

Someone needs to get on the horn and place an order to be delivered to the Staples Center, ASAP. Within should be thousands of horseshoes, amulets, four leaf clovers, and rudraksh nuts. We should also probably ring as many church bells as possible and remove all broken mirrors and step ladders from any Clippers facilities. And a ban on black cats wouldn't be a bad idea either.

I mean, can it get any worse for the Clips? 14 months ago they were jousting with the Suns in the Western Conference semis and looking every bit like a rising power in the NBA. Now? Not so much. Cassell washed up in a hurry, Dunleavy snookered the team into an extension (true Clippers fans and those familiar with Mike Sr.'s work all seemed to know right from the outset that this was a bad idea), Chris Kaman suffered from the effects of either "getting nuts grabbed hangover" (courtesy of Reggie Evans) or "getting paid hangover," and Shaun Livingston nearly had his leg come flying off his body. Now Elton Brand, the most consistent player in franchise history (by a long shot), has a torn Achilles tendon and might miss the entire 2007-08 season.

Ouch.

Of course, it is possible that Brand - known as an extremely hard worker - could come back as early as February, but that is a best case scenario. Plus, this is a guy that is a notoriously slow starter, which means that the 35 game mark (when he starts getting going) will come at the end of the season.

All of which means the Clips are probably dead in the water before the season even begins and no doubt kicking themselves for drafting a "help now" guy in 76-year old (slight exaggeration) Al Thornton.

Anyone have any ideas for how the Clippers can catch a break? If not, I suggest we send that order of horseshoes on the double.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think they just signed Brevin Knight. Everyone thinks that he would've put the C's over the top, so maybe he can do the same for the Clips. It is too bad about Brand though, he's one of my favorite non-Celtics players. But that's one less power forward Al Jefferson has to beat out for the All Star game.

Anonymous said...

This is a long shot, but it wouldn't be completely insane to knock next door to speak to Mr. Bryant and see if he wants to come to, well...L.A. Actually, never mind.

Anonymous said...

I vote for a good old Merger. Why is this not legal in sports. In the business world if two companies can form to make one solid company a merger happens. I say the city of L.A. merge their two moribund NBA franchises into one. While the merger would put 15 NBA players out of work it would most certainly create one dysfunctional LA organization instead of two. Tired of the two soap operas. Let's just take Days of our Lives and All my Children and make it into one day time drama